Songs for Star Wars the Musical

See the Lamest in Gamerwear.
Gamer Concepts

** "Luke" (to the tune of "Lump" by The Presidents of the USA)
**
** New words by Patrick Mines.

Luke sat alone on Tatooine,
Waiting for something to happen to him.
Droids showed up on the moisture farm,
They totally confused all the passing jawas.

He's Luke, he's Luke, he's in my head.
He's Luke, he's Luke, he's Luke, his family's dead.

Luke lingered long on Dagobah,
And the dream he got was sort of rotten and it seems
Ben lied to him and Vader's his dad.
Is Luke over there hanging out with no hand?

He's Luke, he's Luke, he's in my head,
He's Luke, he's Luke, he's Luke, his family's dead.

(whining)

Luke was standing ready and without a care.
The guard pushed him off and he tumbled through the air.
He did some fairly heroic-type deeds.
Luke left for Endor at subsonic speeds.

He's Luke, he's Luke, he's in my head,
He's Luke, he's Luke, he's Luke, his family's dead.

Is this Luke outta my head?
I think so.
Is this Luke outta my head?
I think so. Yeah! Whooo!
Is this Luke outta my head?
I think so.
Is this Luke outta my head?





** Imperial Rhapsody by: Queen
**
** (sung to: Bohemian Rhapsody)

LANDO: This is the good life
This is a fantasy
Working on Bespin
An escape from Reality.
LEIA: Open your eyes
Stand up to these guys and see.
LUKE: I'm just a farmboy, I need some sympathy
Cuz who's my dad, I dunno
Little whine, little moan.
HAN: Anywhere the Force goes, doesn't really matter, to me

PIETT: Vader just killed a man.
Raised an arm up in the air
Now his life is no longer there.
Vader, we had just begun,
And now I've gone and lost the reb-el scum.
Vader, ooooooo.
Didn't mean to make you mad
If I'm not alive again this time tomorrow,
There'll be a new admiral, as if nothing ever happened.

YODA: Too late, my time has come,
Sends shivers down my spine
Body's aching all the time.
LUKE: Goodbye everybody, I've got to go
Gotta leave you all behind and learn the Force.
PIETT: Vader, ooooooooo.
I don't want to die
I sometimes wish I'd never been born at all.

LUKE: I see a little silhouetto of a man
Palpatine, Palpatine, can it be the Emperor?
Thunderbolts and lightning, very very hurting me!
R2-D2, R2-D2,
R2-D2, R2-D2,
R2-D2, Where'd ya go? C-3PO O O O O O OH!
I'm just a farmboy, nobody loves me.
REBELS: He's just a farmboy, with a dead family.
Spare him this life of such mendacity!
HAN: Spice'll come, spice'll go. Jabba let me go.
JABBA: Bo shuda! (NO, we will not let you go)
HAN: Let me go!
JABBA: Bo shuda! (We will not let you go)
HAN: Let me go!
JABBA: Bo shuda! (We will not let you go)
HAN: LET ME GO!
JABBA: WILL NOT LET YOU GO!
HAN: LET ME GO!
JABBA: WILL NOT LET YOU GO!
HAN: LET ME GO!
JABBA: NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO!

C3PO: Oh R2-D2, R2-D2, R2-D2, Come along.
LEIA: C-3PO has a rebel put aside for meeeee, for meeeeee,
for MEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

(Stormtroopers start headbanging)

LUKE: So you say you're the dear old dad of mine?
But you cut my hand off and left me to die!
Oh Vader, can't do this to me, Vader.
I know there's some good, I know there's still some good in you.

OBIWAN: May the Force be with you.
Use the Force to see.
May the Force be with you,
May the Force be with you, alwaaaaaaaaaaaaays.


HAN: Anywhere the Force goes, doesn't really mat-ter,
to meeeeeeee.




** KENOBI
**
** (sung by Darth Vader to the tune of "Cecilia," during their duel)

CHORUS

Kenobi,
You shouldn't have come back,
You best watch your back
Or I'll kill ya.
Oh Kenooooobi,
Your powers are weak,
You're feeble and meek,
And you're old.
Old, old, old.

Swingin' blades
In the afternoon,
With Kenobi,
He's an old buffoon
(old buffoon)
I cut through
His chest and face,
When he falls to the ground
Air has taken his place.

REPEAT CHORUS

FUNKY NOISES SOLO

Ju-bi-la-tion!
I murdered that coot,
He's stuck to my boot
And I'm laughing.
Ju-bi-la-tion!
I murdered that coot,
He's stuck to my boot
And I'm laughing.

LUKE: Noooooo! No nooooo!
No noooo no no no nooooo! . . .




** Blast, Loot, Pillage, Burn
**
** (Tune- Mickey Mouse Club Theme)

Blast, loot, pillage, burn, blast, loot, pillage, burn.
Who's the leader of the Horde that's made for what we are?
Lord D-A-R-T-H-V-A-D-E-R!
Hey there, hi there, ho there! We'll conquer every star!
Lord D-A-R-T-H-V-A-D-E-R!

Darth Vader! (Obi Wan) Darth vader! (Skywalker!)
For ever let us hold our blasters high! High! High! HIGH!

Come along and sing our song and march with us to war,
Lord D-A-R-T-H-V-A-D-E-R!

(slowly)
Now its time to say goodbye - they're closing up the bar -
Lord D-A- [aaayy]*
R-T-H- ["H" is what he'll give ya!]
V-A-D-E- (pause) R-R-R-R.

*a la the Fonze, including thumbs up gesture.
A- [aaayy]*
R-T-H- ["H" is what he'll give ya!]
V-A-D-E- (pause)



** "I Am The Very Model Of A Modern Diplomatic Droid"
**
** (to the tune of "I Am The Very Model Of A Modern Major General",
** from Gilbert and Sullivan's "Pirates of Penzance")
** From: redfive@yoyo.cc.monash.edu.au (from _HMS DEATHSTAR_)

THREEPIO:
I am the very model of a modern diplomatic droid
I'm fluent in the languages of Robot, Wookiee, humanoid,
A binary loadlifter does not pose the slightest mystery,
I know the rules of protocol and also human history.
I'm very well acquainted too, with matters mathematical,
I understand equations, both the simple and quadratical,
About binomial theorem I'm teeming with a lot o' news --
With many cheerful facts about the square of the hypotenuse

CHORUS
With many cheerful facts about the square of the hypotenuse (X3)

THREEPIO
I'm very good at integral and differential calculus,
I know the scientific names of beings animalculous;
In short, my masters find in me a reason to be overjoyed,
I am the very model of a modern diplomatic droid.

CHORUS
In short his masters find in he, etc.

THREEPIO
I am the very model of a modern diplomatic droid;
Adventure is the sort of thing I'd hoped that I could quite avoid,
For droids who find adventure often find that they get melted down ,

Or shipped out to the Kessel mines and tiresome labor underground.
My counterpart excels at making trouble for the rest of us,
He lured me to the desert where the jawas soon molested us,
They sold us to some farmers, and before the passing of a day,
I had to tell my master that the little twerp had run away

CHORUS
He had to tell etc. (X3)

THREEPIO
Now that were on the Death Star, and stormtroopers swarm the premises,

I'm hiding in the closet with that little Artoo nemesis;
And so I want to make it clear 'ere Artoo gets us both destroyed.
I was the very model of a modern diplomatic droid.

CHORUS
And so he wants to make it clear 'ere Artoo gets them both destroyed,

He was the very model of a modern diplomatic droid.